Wednesday, March 12, 2014

From Mary Jo G.

DH passed away on Sunday after 5 days in a coma.  He was able to stay at home as he wished because of Hospice.  I cannot say enough good things about them.  The 4 local grandkids came quickly and stayed here that night.   DD got in about 3:00 am and has been a comfort and source of help.  Both sons call often.  One is on the Bering Sea and cannot make it here.  The other lost his wife's grandmother the next day and is busy helping there.  He will come for the first week of April and said to have a list of chores that he and the boys can tackle.  Since John wanted no services this is best.
The tears come often; guess that is normal.  I am at peace about his passing though.  I did everything that I could to make him comfortable during this time and have no regrets.  That helps lots.   I've promised DD that I will go out daily and not hole up here.  Hospice will check in weekly and provide grief counseling in about 6 months.  They say not to do it earlier.  Wonder why?
Our weather is in the low  60s, just beautiful out.  Crocus are blooming with the primroses.  Daffodils will pop soon.  This is the first time to see all the bulbs I've planted.  We come home from AZ after they are done.
Not quite ready to take up the quilting but it will happen soon.


At March 12, 2014 at 4:41 PM , Blogger RoseyP said...

Mary Jo, I'll respond here rather that privately and please know I don't mind being the middle person in posting. When I read your email, I felt sadness for you. Emails are blunt visuals. I'm glad you've had the support of Hospice and why six months. I've been through this many years ago and my experience was that it took at least six months for the shock to wear off a bit. Six months, people flock around to help, to support you, then they have to get back to their own lives and at six months I felt worse than when the death occurred. Those next six months are when reality of the death hits you more than the shock of it.

At March 12, 2014 at 4:47 PM , Blogger Fran (Sth Aust) said...

Mary Jo, sending my deepest condolences to you in your loss. I am so glad you have family around you, and other members who will take over in the weeks to come. Thinking of you and also sending <>.
Fran in Sth Aust

At March 12, 2014 at 8:34 PM , Blogger Sara in Florida said...

Mary Jo-sending my condolences also. I agree with Rosey, that 6 months is about right. You have wonderful support of family, so please take advantage of it. Hospice will help later. Our prayers are with you.
Sara in Fla.

At March 12, 2014 at 8:58 PM , Blogger Doris W. in TN said...

Mary Jo - I am so sorry to read of your DH's passing. (((Hugs)))

Hospice has a lot of experience and know what they are doing. I have never heard of the 6 months period, either, but I would trust their judgment.

At March 13, 2014 at 4:24 AM , Blogger Laura in IA said...

Mary Jo, I am sorry to hear of the passing of your DH. Please know that you will be in my thoughts as you adjust to your new life. With sympathy, Laura

At March 13, 2014 at 9:18 AM , Blogger heather said...

Mary Jo, my condolences to you and your family...please take care of yourself and let others be there for you...just as you were for your DH thru the long good bye...sending hugs and prayers..., Heather

At March 13, 2014 at 2:55 PM , Blogger Marion in NZ. said...

Hugs, prayers and condolences from NZ. too. So pleased to hear that the Hospice staff provided such help and support, they are gifted people. So pleased that you have some of your family close by. Take care.


At March 15, 2014 at 10:30 PM , Blogger Mary in Oregon said...

Oh Mary Jo, I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss. As others have said, it's comforting to know you have family close to help you on this journey. If I may, I'd like to recommend a book - Death Without Denial, Grief Without Apology by Barbara Roberts.
Sending you heaps of hugz,
Mary in Oregon

At March 18, 2014 at 11:20 PM , Blogger Bee said...

So sorry to hear of the passing of your DH. Many hugs now and for the future. Bee in NZ

At March 21, 2014 at 8:08 AM , Blogger astroiguana said...

Mary Jo, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. :-(
My deepest sympathies to you and your family
Ronna in Happy Valley



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