Wednesday, August 6, 2014

From MaryJoG via Rosey's posting service

Coming up on 5 months since John passed.  Feel that I have turned a corner in that it is not so raw.  Still sob but can control it now.  Will finish a grief recovery group this week which has made a huge difference.  Puts all in perspective.  Will always miss him but am getting on with life.   It is time to give back and I've come up with a project.  I'd like to train volunteers (hopefully those who have experienced grief a year or more back) to work with the caregivers after a death.  Hospice calls once a month but that doesn't begin to cover needs.  I'd like to work with Hospice the last month or so by meeting with the caregiver while they do their tasks.  Once extended family has left, the volunteer would be there to walk them through the hard things:  Social Security, banking and all the accounts that had the deceased name on them which have to be changed.  Cannot tell you how difficult it was to return his cell phone and have to give them a death certificate.. Had to change plans while I came undone....  Now to find an agency who is interested.  Hospice feels they are doing enough so will look elsewhere.

 Am spending two hours each morning and evening this week in the front flower beds weeding, transplanting, pruning and taking out overgrown plants.  When they come out, I'm surprised to find something hidden and move it to the front.  Half of the new mulch is down.  Hope it protects the plants better and keeps in more moisture.  100s here for about 6 weeks now all is dry.  Gave up in back and took out the plants from the dozen pots.  Soil was too hot for them and no shade back there..  If I keep this place, will go to raised beds instead of pots.

Half of the stash is in order in the shelves and 23 tote bags are emptied and stored upstairs in the new quilt room.  The tote bags were moved from AZ.  Lots of work left before it is functional.

Made reservations to fly to AZ mid September for a week to prepare that home for sale.  Will stay with a good friend.  She has enlisted the guild to help empty the quilt room for the donation.  Hope to leave all but the personal things intact and sell it ready to go for winter visitors.  My son says I can mail the new lazy boy recliners by taking the backs off.  We only used them a few months.  He mailed one to Alaska.



At August 7, 2014 at 9:04 PM , Blogger Mary in Oregon said...

Dear Mary Jo, I'm so very sorry to read about the loss of your husband. Even if one knows the time is getting near, the loss can still be a shock. And you are correct, all the details to deal with after losing someone can be very difficult. Bless you for wanting to help others through that process.

I'm sending you lots of hugs,
Mary in Oregon

At August 8, 2014 at 8:33 AM , Blogger MJ said...

Thanks, Mary. Can use lots of hugs - sure miss them. Saw that you and Jill met up in Sisters for the show. Will try to go next year. (( ))s MaryJo


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